People frown at me for dressing like EVH to work every day. They forget when it used to be cool to work shirtless with baggy orange pants.

hey hagar, my mom wants her bra back.

Vanhagar is further evidence that parallel universes exist. This particular universe however, is one that I implicitly deny.

While it may be argued that I have my head-in-the-sand regarding its, ahem, "existence", I have long since declared a personal jihad on any and all references to it.

If you are lost or wavering, my brother, take a knee, for there is only one true path.

That was me the front row. Red shirt, remember it like it was yesteryear.