This got me to thinking... Ive sat before you in a virtual capacity for over two years, and while I have a pretty good idea of what you all think of the job Ive done here based on the deluge of emails I receive and the comments that are posted, but Ive also spoken with a good many of you on the phone concerning returns, warranty, shipping queries, technical questions regarding bikes and so on as well, then of course theres the rare occasion that we may have met in person. All of these interactions I suppose could be looked at as some sort of lowbrow ambassadorship for this little company we all love.

So I suppose my question is this; As an informal mouth piece for Swobo, (with an emphasis on 'mouth') Id really like to know how you all think I am I doing. In what areas, if any, have I personally exceeded expectations, and where have I fallen short? Are there some aspects that you as friends, acquaintances, valued customers, or complete strangers, could identify that could help me do a better job either here on How to Avoid The Bummer Life, or within the confines of the warehouse operation itself?

Think of me as your employee, and its your task to provide me with an annual review of sorts.

Dont worry about hurting my feelings, as I have none, and if I learned anything at all while attending art school, it was how to graciously accept constructive criticism, so let em rip either in the comments, or if you wish, directly to my email.

stevil@swobo.com

I thank you in advance for your insight, and I look forward to hearing from you.
Operators are standing by.

Now then, lets get on with the regularly scheduled nonsense, shall we?

The world is a playground for the woefully underrated Sergio Layos.

Captain Pauls whirlwind appearance has come and gone, and with it, a bunch of cans of beer as well. My man is a died-in-the-wool beer snob, or a beer aficionado rather, but it didnt prevent him from arriving on my doorstep with and 18 pack of Budweiser and a hankering for a bike ride.
We suited up and departed for points unknown, with me on my cross bike and him on his. Once deep into the woods, we drank a whole lot more beer and chatted with folks who passed by and shared their snacks with us.
Eventually we ran into Dan, who was fixing his pedal with a stick;

Later we watched Paul fix a flat, not using a stick;

Then we rode through a series of creeks;

Then we saw a mini van taking a Tyrannosaurus rex to what I assumed to be a birthday party, or maybe soccer practice;

After going home to get cleaned up we went and had cocktails and sang at a Keroke bar;

And after all of that, Paul ran away naked into the darkness screaming something about "the government knows what Im thinking!" and "Sov owes me $12.67!"

..And that was the last we saw of The Captain.

Mail bag time? Yeah... Mail bag time.

Nick writes;

"Great song.. Even better dancing."

I liked it, and I didnt like it all at the same time.
But mostly I liked it.

Hurl sent this one;

I suppose that makes sense. I mean the Pigeons are looking at each other like it does, and if theres one thing I know, its to never question the facial expressions of italian cartoon Pigeons.
Im sure you all would like the full story behind this future Pulitzer Prize winner, so all you gotta do is go here.

Then Peter writes;

"Just thought I'd drop you this sweet pic of our Tuesday evening Poachfest. Ran into the Fairfax Crowd at Joe's, they said they got chased off the mtn at R.R. grade and Hogsback. Word on the streets, or trails as it may be, is that the patrols on tuesday and wednesday are up and about on the frontside of tam especially. Easy pickins' for the man, as the rangers can camp out and watch the lights roll around on the hill.

Anyway, we opted for an undisclosed location, but lets say if you were at the Pelican Inn and just finished a Guiness, for strength of course, and wanted to get to legally get yourself up to Bobcat... We may have ridden that "the wrongway" down that trail...and it was epic.

Note: D.Griffs rockin the unicorn for 1st looser at the 30 30 finale."

Mickeys still not gotten me my jersey, but I expect itll be showing up any day now.

Anyway, no sooner did 'the ink dry' on Peters first email, do I get blasted by a second;

"I just thought I'd share this with you. Many have speculated that an alter-ego of mine is incapable of doing this (attached photo). It has been a fun back and forth with the kids, but at some point said ego was forced to respond with the following:

"There have been some speculations about the Kung Fu Cowboy's ability to kick at such great heights, as well as land upon his own two feet without massive trauma.

Well let the Kung Fu Cowboy (that's right 3rd person referral) assure you all that He can not only almost fully extend his right leg to perform the "flying carcass"(Kung Fu Cowboy's not afraid of yoga), but he can leap like an African jumping frog, and his feet almost always land beneath his Chuck Norris like torso.

Oh and for the naysayers, Kung Fu Cowboy don't use no futoshop!

Hiya,

The Only K.F.C. "

Bruce Lee was famous for his 'Cobra Style', whereas The Kung Fu Cowboy has perfected the 'Redneck Style', which generally results in a broken, bullet riddled washing machine getting dumped in your front yard.

Hey, remember a few weeks ago and I was discussing the wingnuts from Kansas who protest anything and everything somehow related to homosexuality, and that Id mentioned if God does in fact hate fags, that he in all likelihood probably hates alot of other things as well? Well, TinaB sent this bit from Laughing Squid on to us, proving that his hatred is not only limited to fags, pants, belt buckles, shellfish, paperback books, Zebras, crossbows, dynamite, Fred Sanford, bungee jumping, those prank ice cubs with flys in them, softball mitts, Slurpees, wrist rockets, flower pots, snooze buttons, bandanas, and hacky sacks, but he hates signs too.

Yep, God sure hates a bunch of stuff.

Heres a good one from Frank;

"So there is a movement afoot.
Barack Brains(dot)com
Theres a facebook group to petition to get Bad Brains to play the inauguration. Clinton had Fleetwood Mac, now its our generation's turn."

Holy mother of the little baby Jesus, I think thats the best idea Ive heard since the last really, really good idea I heard, and while were on the topic of The Bad Brains, lets check out a video of one of my favorite tunes by them.
Wouldnt you know that its 'Soul Craft'?

Im a day late and a dollar short on this next one from (Pento) Graham;

"I know it's cross season and all but, this thing is insane... "Now after 5 years, we are up to 105 miles and 14,600 ft of climbing."

I got about 4,ooo feet of climbing under my belt on Saturday, and I still feel like napping.
The burning question here is though- Why does that clown have a fanny on the front of his left leg?

Barry writes regarding 'a couple for Friday', which of course are now going to be 'a couple for Monday'.

I immediately wondered if before the mail person delivers that days post, if they ever feel inclined to don a rubber glove.

Say, did you know that Urban Velo Number 10 is about to hit newsstands? Its true, but you can get a virtual peek here.

Its Monday, and were all here together again. Again Id like to thank anyone in advance for helping me along in my review, unless you say mean stuff, but once I dry my tears, I know it will only lend to my serving you better, and at the end of the day, isnt that really all Im here for?
Now get cracking.. those doughnuts arent going to make themselves.