I feel the need to reiterate a point.. While its true, I have been having a bit of a pity party on behalf of my hands, Its really with tongue planted at least partially in cheek. I mean, sure its a kind of a drag.. Especially when I get a call from Skinny Bee and he tells me of the amazing summer hes had and all of the fantastic hijinx (off road, and otherwise) that hes gotten into, but when I put things into perspective, Im well aware that I really dont have it so bad.

In fact, in an email I recently received from The Queen B in which she detailed a recent velodrome slam, not alot unlike that of our friend The Masi Guy, both of which left our heros battered, beaten and bruised.

That got me to thinking further about the barrage of injuries that not only have affected me over the course of the last year, but those that a good number of people around me have had as well, and while on a road ride last night it dawned on me that in comparison, anyone who is able to still throw a leg over a bike and get the hell out of dodge, in whatever capacity, is still very lucky.
Along with that, I realized that just because Im on the road all of the time doesnt mean that there arent a slew of amazing experiences to be had just the same. For example, I took a paved spin up the hill to meet up with the Wednesday ride last evening and ran into Mr. Gill, who was wearing a U.S. Postal skin suit. Unfortunately for you, I was in such awe, that I didnt think of snapping a shot of it until it was too late. Among other pressing topics, we discussed the semantics of wether or not he was poured, packed or stuffed into said skinsuit, until I eventually bid farewell, and headed back down the road.
I noted that while the photographic opportunities werent exactly what I was used to, Id snap a few just the same.

For example, heres a photo of my best friend in the whole world. He likes bicycles too;

Eventually we saw this sign, but we were all like, 'nuts to that.'

Luckily we came across the rarely photographed mating habitat for the 'whitis trashamongus', but sadly saw no specimens;

We also saw a sleeping deer...

It was noted that we cast a shadow debunking the popular theory that we have no soul;

Once back in civilization, we saw our favorite truck in the world. Usually there is a surf board neatly tucked in the back. Surfers love the environment.

Then upon our arrival home, this is what was waiting for us;

Much like Ice Cube, we had a good day.

You know, our boy Newt out in Chicago likes the road bikes as well. Not that this has anything to do with it, but he sent an email containing this which almost makes sense.

So all of that aside, I also have a jam packed inbox, which I would like to begin to regurgitate on you now.
Are you ready?
I dont care.

Tim writes;

"I love to ride my bike. There’s always something new, some new story to tell my wife when I get home, like being chased home by a thunderstorm through the Flint Hills, where I’m literally the tallest object within several miles in any direction, a perfect lighting rod, keeping pace exactly with the leading edge of hail and wind. Or seeing the shadows of a dozen vultures circling overhead in the 100 degree heat when they realize that I’ve just sucked down the last drop of water in my stash and still have 10 miles yet to go to the nearest drink. Or the screaming hawk that swoops down over my head as I race toward his catch of road kill opossum, or coon, or rabbit. (They always come at me from behind and really scare the shit out of me!) Honestly, Mr. Hawk, I have no interest in your lunch. Then there’s the pheasant, startled by my rapid descent down a hill and decides to escape certain doom by flying out of the ditch through my front wheel. Then there are larger creatures, like the escaped horse trotting down the middle of the road, which I have learned from experience to give a wide berth while passing, lest they freak out and kick you in the head. (I actually caught an escaped horse in downtown Topeka, once. I enticed it to munch on some tall grass I’d pulled up from the sidewalk, grabbed its mane and walked it a block and a half to the animal control office at the police station. The look on their faces when they opened the door!!!!!! Look what I caught!!!) And then most recently, a feral pig that chased me about 100 yards up a hill this past Saturday. It occurred to me, after my adrenaline came down from overdrive, that I’d just imagined it, a black pig, snorting and squealing just like you’d expect an angry pig to snort and squeal, leaping from the underbrush on the side of the road, and giving a very good chase up the road………..A dog? Miniature horse? What the hell was that? But the existence of said pig is well known in that part of the county, and it was confirmed by a co-worker who’d just moved out there and also was chased by the pig on her horse. I honestly didn’t realize that pigs can run faster than dogs! Now I do!

Yes, what brave new world that has such creatures in it! A bicycle in the countryside, freaking out the local residents. I love to ride my bike."

and then concluded that with a second, shorter email;

"A fellow biker who’s much faster and stronger than me just reminded me that it’s thought that the newly discovered mountain lions in these parts take care of most of the feral pigs.

I feel so much better now.

tp"

Its always safe to remember that no matter what anyone says, man is most definitely not at the top of the food chain.

Unless you have a moustache.

...And one from Peter

"Hey Stevil-

Got this one from my friend Becca Schepps, an all out design and copy-writing dynamo. It will get you fired up on some nostalgia and design and the direction of it in this country for sure, from a design stand point anyway. Oh yeah here is her new bitchen fixie to boot... Oh again for one more thing, she also packs heat."

Regards,

Peter"

Firstly, youll need to imagine a picture of a young woman shooting a handgun for that 'packs heat' reference. Im just too lazy to include it.
Secondly, in regards to the video clip, there are long standing theories of which I know Ive mentioned here before, that state children who are raised around the cookie cutter strip malls and milk toast housing tracts have a substantially lower I.Q. than those who are raised in an environment consisting of visual variation. The next time you pass by a big box store or Best Buy or whatever, take note that its places like those that are helping to make people stupid.

Jocke sent us a blast from the past;

"Found this in a drawer this morning.

It has beer and froth stains on it but no instructions
on how to clean it, it has no labels nothing.
Dryclean or just plain 30c wash?

Please help.

Jocke / Sweden"

Jocke, the beer and froth stains came with the tie, man...

El Gato sent us this;

"Stevil,

Prescribed treatment for adrenaline deficit disorder sufferers.

El Gato"

Ill be damned if it didnt work for me.
Twice.

I used to have a housemate who had a collection of gigantic snakes, one of which was a Burmese Python that was was like, 16 feet long. They were amazing animals and I loved everything about living with them, with the exception of the smell.
Anyway, at one point Catboxxx, (who if you dont know, is quite petite) was staying over on her and GenOs way through town once and she said she didnt sleep so well on account of because she was sure she was going to be eaten in the night.

As lovely as those big animals were, they certainly werent chick magnets, (and I wont even begin to go into the bags of rats and rabbits that were in the freezer.)

CFO had a star sighting;

"Brosef,

Iam 99.666% sure this is Ben Harper with his custom Pegoretti of the Gita site...I went there to see how I may want to build mine up (over the next 25 years) and saw this in the owners section..."

The dude can kill it on a guitar, and he like the nice bikes. He just moved up a notch in my book.

Captain Fishbeard from Pedal and Paddle (dot)com writes;

"I know that this is just shameless begging from my ego to be on your completely rad radar but I really do NOT know a better way to avoid the bummer life better than this. I did it today and almost forgot that I had to go to work tomorrow and be a mortician.
- Capt. Fishbeard"

Boise... Are you paying attention?

One of our Canadian compatriots, Darcy writes;

"Hey Stevil,
It is BMX but has a great soundtrack if you are sick of bike videos with so-cal punk for music. Plus. this guy rides backwards so effortlessly it makes my stomach churn with jealousy.

I am hoping to get a Folsom from your Swobo dealer in Saskatoon when I am visiting there next week so I can practice(failing at) riding backwards on my morning commutes.

--Darcy
PS
You really need a dealer in Alberta, specifically Calgary.

Bruce is my new best hero, and I thank you for sending that on.
And now for Darcy and all of our Canadian friends, I offer this shirt that The Skipper recently turned me on to;

Maybe they should also have a print on the back that says "America. The Canadian hats egomaniacal and self important head."

Tyler also wrote in with a call to arms;

"Hello,
Discovery Channel is looking for individuals that want to join an epic journey through Alaska. Howtoavoidabummerlife.com has a great readership and I was hoping you could let them know of our search. Here is the info for the Alaska Adventurer.
Please email me if you have any questions. Thank you.

Tyler
GotCast.com"

Sadly, Tyler doesnt realize that the only people who read this are El Corpo and my mom.

Only the punk wrote in with some amazing shots from a recent trip to the big rodeo;

"Well, i did it, it took a few hours!Italian pro Pantani did it on smack in about 40 mins or something, i did it on a Torque Gel and a packet of Grany(sic) bars lofi style! It was well worth all the sweat and sunburn though cause the descent is a total blast, also i pissed off quite a few roadies by hanging onto their wheels and then passing them HA!

Bourg D'Oisans in the valley below near to the top.....

My weapon of choice.....

Hairpin 18 near the bottom, dedicated to Frank Shleck, obviously didn't impress the recumbent rider having a snooze on the wall. All the race day photos were taken on this corner.....

The Joaquim Agostinho memorial.....

Hairpin 2 and i'm nearly there this one is dedicated to Marco Pantani.....

The finish line!.....

Ifin you have a hankering to peep more of the photos from the trip, just click here.

One thing no one should ever fforget to bring along when traveling abroad is a suitcase like this one Otis sent;

"Yo Stevil,

As I have not yet gotten around to taking snaps of my newly re-painted and restored 1992 MB-1, which I can safely say will make you drool, I offer this drool-inducing collection of pork delights.

Think you can get it past homeland security?

Love from the NW,

Otis"

Man, if you tried to get that through security at the airport, I believe its safe to say youd get locked away and the key would never be seen again.

You wanna know something thats sucks? This is something that sucks.

But not nearly as much as this;

In response to that, our very own JMac writes;

"I think at this point, Norway is just fucking with us to see what we’ll say is rad."

Would you believe that I have about one million more miles of this stuff to sort through, but Ill save that for later. I have a feeling that there were a couple of alley cat flyers that Im neglecting to post, Like this one for example-

-which is going to make me look dickish, but Ive yet to figure out how to color code my emails so Im basically just going though my inbox by feel.

Wait... I found a flyer for a race that hasnt happened yet. I feel like Im getting back in the game;

More info about this here throw down can be found here.

Ok, the plug has got to be pulled here. The weekend is almost upon us which is good due to the fact that Im barely keeping my head above water.
Like the Backstreet Boys once so eloquently stated, 'hang tough.'
Or was that 'hangin' tough'?

Either way, have a great weekend everybody.