Would you like to see what it looks like when you loan Simon your custom Hunter cross bike?

He blamed his catastrophic meeting with gravity on his sorely worn out shoe falling off, so to remedy this, I offered him a brand new pair of custom Vans upon our arrival home, but due to the fact that his size 14 flippers that pass as feet are so much larger than mine, he wandered off into the darkness still donning his broke ass Converse.
So if a bike loan is in your future with Simon, consider yourself warned.

Squid gave us a call again this week. I love talking to that guy cause his thick New York accent bullys itself through the line and kicks the phones ass as I hold it.
Anyway, he sent this promo clip on that his boy Carlos just shot.

He also graced us with a DVD thats available though them which follows the antics of last years Velocity Tour as well as the New York City and Chicago alleycats that ran in conjunction, so if you think you might like a whole lotta footage of a whole lotta dirtbags killing it at various velodromes and in and out of the city streets, then I highly recommend you get your hands on a copy.

Speaking of which, this years Velocity Tours almost upon us.

Whats your excuse for not making it through?
Mines cause Im not tough enough, so that ones taken.
You gotta find your own.

Now onto other news. Hurl wrote to give us some insight on this past weekend Frostbike in Minneapolis;

"actual footage from Frostbündt, QBP's annual winter bike orgy, 16-February-2008. The rumoured Texas Twins Race never materialized, but the combination of not one, but two, steering wheel-equipped rides provides hours of derby enjoyment for the awestruck bystanders.

This is rock-n-roll bicycle action when adults on bicycles can revel in the combination of cycling and a few hundred cocktails with good friends. It somehow makes the spirit just feel a little more sanguine about the human condition. Here's the thing: Bikes are fucking cool..."

You know- you just cant argue with that kind of logic.

Im sure you all have come across Biker Fox at some point or another... I have and my retinas still hurt.
Anyway, Pete sent this to us.
I dont really know what to say.
You might want to not watch it, and just punch yourself in the face instead.
Not surprisingly its got pretty much the same effect.

Come to think of it- did we have dinner in the presence of greatness the other night, or is this just a trend were in the midst of?

Oh sweet Jesus, where am I?...

Our friends at OneonOne Bike shop in Minneapolis have finally dropped the other shoe, as it were, and gotten an online shop cooking.
And just as if you were within the walls of their very establishment, theyve even found a way to belittle you while you peruse their goods.
Theres still no word however if theyll run next door to pick up a little something extra for your order.

This just in from Amigo numero quatro;

"My son KAI is the coolest but sometimes he can be a little devil. Instead of putting him on time out when he's bad we put him in the SWOBO corner. He hates it but DR Phil would be proud. It's funny- whenever we put him in pearl izumi he smiles like he just got laid."

Pearl Izumi huh? The boys young, so Ill cut him some slack, but so far its obvious that hes got no taste.

This just in from DPow!

"Re: Two Words

Street

Hobby

Get on the train, or feel the pain. of being clowned by faceless hipsters."

Are you asking yourself if I maybe thought to email this to the Bike Snob?
You might be, and I did, though he was probably making fun of this before I even got out of bed today.
Hes good like that.

Say, do you all remember when we posted the photos of these guys?

If not, heres the back story;

"These kids from Boston came down to Florida for a few weeks, and have been loving the hell out of it. They love the beaches, they love the theme parks, they love the weather. My friend Charlie was getting tattooed yesterday and I tagged along with the Boston kids who were crashing on his couch out of boredom.

He gets his work done, and we're about to head out, when one of the kids, out of nowhere, is all like "Fu*k it" and asks if the artist has time. He does, so Dude #1 gets a forearm piece of Mickey ears, a roller coaster, palm trees, and a space shuttle taking off. His first tattoo ever. Charlie and I are already cracking up because this kid who had never, ever been to Florida just got a pretty big whack-off piece to the Sunshine State.

The his buddy's all "You know what? Fu*k it, too." and demands a tattoo of his own to remember florida by. Dude #2's got to outdo his buddy, though, and gets a sunset across his Adam's apple, two pink flamingos with sunglasses near his caratoid arteries, and some plam trees. Full color. Fu*king nuts.

I'm hanging out with the Boston kids tonight, totally getting pictures."

Our number one superstar Hawk just sent an email that ranks right up there with these;

"Just before Christmas, I was up in PA hanging with my daughter and staying with a good friend. His name's Paul, and he seems to be clinging to the untied shoelace of conventional society. For this I love him. I tore out a page from one of my sketchbooks and gave it to him as a gift. And he was happy.

Yesterday I got a photo from Paul. It displays one of the images that lived on the page of that sketchbook, though in an entirely different medium. I thought you might like to see.

Love,
Hawk"

And as long as were on the subject of the most absurd of the absurd, we can never exclude our boy Jonny;

Weve got a bunch more stuff, but well save it for later.
Its Friday.
Lets do Prince proud and party like its 1999.