CO: I would go so far as to say that RAD is the greatest documentary film of our time. Having grown up steeped in all things BMX, your story is my story.
As a child I wanted to be you Cru', and I thank you so much for sitting down and visiting with me.

CJ: You're welcome.

CO: I'll keep it brief because I know you are a very busy man, but after your miraculous win at Helltrack
you sorta dropped off the map. What have you been up to the past 21 years?

CJ: I forget. Smoking hash and trying to get a kissing booth at the X Games mostly.
-So far no takers.

CO: People tell me RAD was not a documentary... Real movies don't have booms and microphones in every shot.

CJ: What do you mean it's not a documentary? I stand by the fact that it IS a documentary. Of course it's a documentary. I could beat the crap out of you for even implying that.
..What's a documentary?

CO: My brother says you were doing time for selling meth like Christian Hosoi?

CJ: Your brother is an asshole. I was doing more meth than Tom Sizemore, but I only loan my meth or trade it for crack. Please- no more insulting questions. Wanna buy some Meth? Give my props to Christian.

CO: Are you still together with that Christian Hollings girl? Ill bet she is dynamite in the sack.

CJ: You bet! What do you mean SHE? Didnt you see the bicycle boogie sequence?

CO: Do you still do much ass sliding? Try as I may, I have never been able to find a suitable ass sliding spot! Well, on the rocks at least.

CJ: No, last time I did it was the famous pine cone incident, I'm still walking funny, I tell ya.

CO: Ok...Enough with the nipple twisting. Tell me about Helltrack- what was it really like?

CJ: The name speaks for itself, it was just TRACK!

CO: And man, what about that Kix Bowl?

CJ:(SNORTING NOISES) Huh?

CO: I must have tried a million times to ride over those logs like you...I even paused my VCR to get the spacing right. How was it that you did that?

CJ: Adrenalin man, pure adrenalin.
(Pig adrenalin. I have some of that for sale also.)

CO: In all honesty, who was the better Reynolds, Rod or Rex?

CJ: with a name like Rod, who would you invite ass sliding?

CO: Neither of them were as cool as Burt though...Ya know what I'm sayin' Muthafucka?

CJ: Lemme tell ya. Bert is nothin without Ernie, muthafucka!

CO: Did you ever blood dope??

CJ: I find these questions very offensive. No, I never put blood in my dope. Eeeewww! Ever hear of AIDS?

CO: No offense, but the "bicycle boogie" was the gayest moment in cinematic history..I can't believe a shredder like you would do that....It was for the pelt right? Tell me it was for the pelt!

CJ: You bet it was, and it worked too! Rod was totally impressed!
He flew out of the closet like a murphy bed!

CO: Any Chance or a comeback? Beijing '08?

CJ: As soon as I'm out on the work release program, I will email Beijing 08- does he do golden showers?

CO: So now that we're official, can I have a spot on RAD Racing?

CJ: Let me think...FUCK OFF.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You've witnessed history in the making here folks, and there's proof out there that the kids are paying attention.

Shortly after the Hell Track victory, Cru changed his name to Bill Allen, but we all know greatness can changes its name, but will never be able to hide its face.

Thank you CO, and thank you Cru.
I think we can all agree that we're a little bit better off than we were fifteen minutes ago.
Sortof.